Trying To Find Balance…

Good Morning!  Happy Wednesday!  Today would normally be Wedding Talk Wednesday, however I haven’t posted in a week so I want to talk a little bit about why and what has been going on.  First, and for most, I want to apologize for my lack of posting.  This week break really made me realize how much I love and care about blogging.  I haven’t been commenting or reading blogs as much either and I miss it.  It really has become such a part of my life that I am not willing to give up no matter what.

I’m going to make an attempt to explain briefly why I haven’t posted but I am not going to completely get into all of the details and you will understand why when I explain.  Last Wednesday, I thought I was going to have a normal day at work.  However, that was the day that my life had changed.  That is when I had to learn to become more cautious, and take notice of my surroundings.  When I was required to be escorted when coming into work and leaving work.  I have had some issues at work in relation to my security when I am there. 

Again, I don’t want to go into too much detail because I am hoping this individual does not read my blog but you are never 100% sure.  Someone showed up at my work, that I have absolutely no clue who this individual is trying to see me.  He made up lies that we had spoken before and even proceeded to pull a rose out of his jacket.  I have no idea who this person is.  I don’t know how they found out information about me.  It is VERY scary.  The only reason that I know what this person looks like is because I was given pictures. 

My life is not the same now.  I feel as though people look at me differently at work even though I had nothing to do with anything.  I want this person caught for what they are doing to me.  I require security around me at all times when I am work.  It’s really frightening.  The only time I truly feel safe is when I am with my family or friends away from work.  I am hoping this person realizes what they are doing and either stops or gets caught.  Enough is enough already.

I haven’t blogged because truthfully I was afraid to.  This blog is a huge part of my life and I am not going to stop just because of one sick individual.  I have given this an awful lot of thought and I have decided I am moving forward with my blog.  I am not going to give up something that I have worked so hard for.  The friendships that I have made, and my loyal readers who read my blog everyday.  I will not give that up.

So despite all of this, I am still in a lot of pain with my stomach.  On Monday, I saw a new GI doctor.  This doctor is extremely book smart!  She knew exactly what she was talking about.  She was the first doctor to discuss the nodule that was found on my colon.  Apparently, I have some kind of infection in my colon.  That is the first part of what is going on.  The second part is that she thinks that I could have Crohn’s Disease or Inflammatory Bowl Disease.  The only true way to diagnose these and see actually what is going on with my colon is through a colonoscopy.  I am scheduled for one this Friday.  I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared out of my mind.  I am hopeful though that they will finally find out what is going on with me. 

One month ago, I was rushed to the emergency room and had my appendix removed and my stomach has never been the same.  So I deserve answers and the help I need to get well.  I am just hoping they can figure out what is going on.  It’s hard to live in constant pain.

In other news, I’ve been trying to have more dairy-free options to see if that would help with my stomach.  The lovely company, Earth Balance sent me some free coupons to try out their products.  I have always wanted to try their products but they are just way too expensive for me to purchase on my own.  I was so excited at the options that I could try not requiring me to take my lactaid pills!

I picked out two products to try.  They were the sticks of “butter” and the tub of whipped “butter.”

Earth Balance sticks

 

Earth Balance Whipped

 
I started off my meal with a salad with lots of vegetables in it.
 

My salad

 

My dinner plate (that round thing is a chicken patty!)

 
I tried the Earth Balance on my baked potato and I loved it!  It had the consistency of real butter even though it’s completely dairy-free and vegan!  It didn’t upset my stomach more than the pain that I have been feeling.  So that is a good thing!  It was great to have “butter” without taking my medicine.  I’m looking forward to trying baking with the actual sticks.  That will be amazing!
 
So that is pretty much what has been going on with me.  I have been holding off on some wedding things until I am feeling better and the issue with work calms down.  Although I’m running out of time for our save the dates.  I need to send them out by next month.  So I think within the next couple of days Mike and I will solidify our guest list and I will begin designing our save the dates.  I’m just trying to take things one step at a time with my health and our wedding and everything else in life.  If I think about too much it overwhelms me and it makes my stomach hurt even more.
 
I hope you will continue to read my blog.  I am going to get back to my routine of posting everyday.  What has been new in your life?  How do you find balance when you are overwhelmed?
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23 Responses

  1. Hey there! I am so so sorry to hear about what has been going on in your life. I really hope they find that guy and he’s punished. That has to be so hard. I am really glad you are still deciding to blog though, I’m sure it was a tough decision and one not made lightly, but I really do enjoy reading it. Good luck on Friday, hopefully things will go well and/or at least you’ll get a diagnosis. UC and IBS aren’t fun but they are both controllable by diet and some meds to prevent flare ups if necessary. Hang in there babe, your readers are here to support you the entire way :D

    • Thank you so much, Maria! That is so incredibly sweet what you wrote to me! I appreciate it. :) I really hope that they catch him too. I’d like to know where he got my information from. I keep thinking that it has to be from the hospital. It definitely was a tough decision to make but I missed blogging and I decided that I can’t live in fear forever and let this person take over my life. Thank you! :)

  2. Geez, you just can’t catch a break, can you? I feel so terrible that you’ve had to deal with all of this at the same time — one thing alone is bad enough, but it’s like you’ve been hit by multiple bricks at the same time. That’s beyond frightening about the work situation. I’m glad they’re helping you out and giving you the security you need.

    And as for the stomach problems — thank goodness you finally have a doctor who knows what to do!! I’ll be sending tons of good thoughts your way on Friday. It’ll be over before you know it, and then you can start feeling better once and for all.

    Sending hugs <3

    • No, it’s been awful! :( I feel like instead of a black cloud over my head, I have a black sky. It is very scary especially since I don’t know what information he has or where he got it from. It’s really awful.

      Thank you so much! I’m hoping that I have answers tomorrow. I’m just nervous about the whole thing. Thank you so much, Shari! <3

  3. Oh hun I am so sorry you are dealing with that. What a creeper! I’d kick his ass for you if I knew who and where he was. <3 I hope things settle down and the a-hole gets caught. You don't deserve any more stress than you've already dealt with! If you need to call me for anything at all, do not hesitate!

    • Thank you, Krissie! :) It’s definitely been so incredibly stressful dealing with everything. I just want him to get caught and I want answers with my health. I will definitely take you up on that! Thanks hun! <3

  4. Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry to hear about that freak who showed up at your job! I really hope they catch him and he leaves you alone. I’m glad that you’re being safe and taking the necessary precautions. Do you read the blog Carrots n’ Cake? She was recently diagnosed with Crohns disease. There’s some great tips for managing it. I have a good friend with a very sensitive colon as well, and it hasn’t really hindered anything in his life. Sometimes he needs to be careful about what he eats, but other than that, it’s been pretty manageable. I hope you get some answers soon!

    • Thank you, Jessica! :) I hope they catch him too. It’s scary because I don’t know what information he has about me and where he got it from. I do read Carrots n’ Cake. I must have missed when she said she has Crohns. I’ll have to go back and check it out. Thank you so much :) I appreciate it.

  5. oh my gosh, that’s terrible. I would feel so violated and terrified. Hopefully it stops soon and he leaves you alone :(

  6. Oh my goodness! How scary for you – I’m so sorry. That really makes things fall into perspective, huh? What’s really scary is that I don’t think you’ve ever said where you work!

    Good luck on Friday. At least answers will be coming your way!

    • It definitely does! It’s just awful. I have never mentioned where I work or what I do on here. That is why I am thinking he got my information from the hospital or something of that nature. That is the only place that I’ve been running back and forth to.

      Thank you so much! :) I hope so!

  7. I’m so sorry for what happened to you! Seriously I hope whoever it is get caught too. It must be so scary for you and I totally understand why you didn’t want to post for the past week. I would’ve been afraid to too. But I’m glad you’re still going to continue to post though. I just hope everything will get better for you.

    I actually tried baking a blueberry cake the other day using earth balance butter stick although I don’t think it was the vegan kind. I liked it though since it’s better for you.

    • Thank you, Kim! It defnitely is scary because I don’t know where he got my information from. The only place I can think of is the hospital because of giving my insurance information and saying where I work. It’s very scary. I am thankful that I am continuing to blog. I missed it. Thank you :) I appreciate that so much!

      That is awesome! Blueberry cake sounds delicious.

  8. That is horrifying, I hope the situation gets better ASAP!

  9. OMG! I actually got sick to my stomach when I read about that guy stalking you. I’m so glad you have security around you. You have enough worries about your health without adding that! I pray you feel better soon and that the pain disappears. Love you and worry about you~~Jane

    • Oh, Jane! It’s been absolutely awful! Just awful. I am thankful security has been here too. Thank you so much, Jane! I promise once I feel better we must get together and catch up! I miss you so much! Love you!

  10. OMG! That is so scary! I really hope that he gets caught because it’s not fair for you to have to be constantly looking over your shoulder because of some wierdo. I’m really sorry, you don’t deserve to have all this happening to you at once!
    I hope this new doctor can finally give you some answers so you can finally stop living with all this pain. If you ever need anyone to vent to about it all, you can always shoot me a tweet or email! Hope all is well with you!

    • I really hope he gets caught too! That is why I am hoping he comes back because everyone knows about him now. He can’t get away. It is very scary. Thank you so much, Sylvia! I appreciate that so much! I am definitely going to take you up on that! :) I hope you are doing well.

  11. Oh girl. Oh my. Wow. Really. Wow.

    Okay, start over…

    I am so sorry you have had to deal with this. I can’t imagine how terrifying that would be. Sorry I missed this post yesterday, I am just now catching up on blog reading. Anyway, I really hope your peace of mind will return soon!

    Ps. I just bought some earth balance butter! I haven’t tried it yet, but I’m glad to know that it worked out well for you!

  12. [...] difficult not to when you aren’t feeling well.   I haven’t talked about this since I first mentioned this situation on my blog.  The person that showed up at my work asking for me, that I had no clue who they were [...]

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